As an engaged, or newly married couple, you have advice thrown at you from all kinds of sources. Parents say one thing, books say another, your pastor says something else. While most of this advice may be sound, if you really want a successful marriage, there are just a few things to keep in mind as you begin your journey together.
Never Go to Bed Angry
You’ve probably heard this one more time you can count, but there is a reason for it. All couples will have their disagreements, but it’s crucial that no one goes to bed with hard feelings. You may have to stay up until 2 am and you may have to take a breather, say sorry, and lay your head down in peace.
Don’t Forget Date Night
Never stop dating. Whether it’s the movies every Saturday or Netflix once a month, make sure there are nights where it’s just the two of you. Newly married couples need time to focus on one another. You may think that it will always come easy, but life can get in the way. You don’t need to go to a big event or spend a lot of money. Just listen, talk, and enjoy each other’s company.
Never Stop Laughing
If a day goes by when you don’t laugh with each other, you’re doing it wrong. At the beginning of a relationship, humour is used to woo and attract one another. But oftentimes, that humour seems to fade with age. This is not something you want to happen in your relationship. Not only does laughter reduce stress hormones, but it releases endorphins, making those night ins that much better.
If your relationship didn’t start out as a friendship, that’s okay. Make sure that it becomes one. You should have other friends, but your partner should forever be your best friend. Laugh together, play together, come to each other for advice.
Make a Budget and Stick with It
Money is the number one thing that couples fight about. To prevent that, all you have to do is sit down together, set a budget, and be transparent with your spending habits. Whether you share an account or not is up to you but letting each other know what you spend on is important.
Show Respect, Especially in Public
Making fun of each other when you’re alone can be all in good fun, but when you are out in public, it’s important to never exploit each other. No one wants to be embarrassed or be the butt-end of someone’s joke. Be gracious, kind, and respectful at all times.
Read Your Vows Every Year
This may seem small, but trust us, you won’t regret it. Make a print-out of your vows and every year on your anniversary, declare them to each other. It doesn’t matter if you’re fighting or not. Do it. You need to remember the promises you made to each other.
You Vs. Problem
Many couples get into this war where they face off against each other when problems arise. But the best thing you can do always remains a team. When something comes up, it’s the two of you working together to fix the problem. When you’re working against each other, the problem will never, ever get fixed. You make a good team! So, show that problem who is the boss.
Be Mindful of Each Other’s Needs
This is probably the most important thing you can do. Being self-aware may be the second most important thing, but being aware of your partner’s thoughts, emotions, and needs are one of the best things you can do for your relationship. Developing empathy for your partner will let them know that you feel their pain, share their joy, and would never intentionally do anything to hurt them.
What if you don’t know your partner well enough? You’ll learn. In the meantime, make it a priority to learn as much about them as possible. While knowing their favourite colour is great, knowing what makes them happy, uncomfortable, or stressed is even better! And guys, no matter how long you’re married…never stop trying to learn.
If you are newly engaged and looking for inspirations, click through the links to read more about our real wedding features!
Interest in more? Read the following: